“We were just, you know, dancing,” Meghan Alexander said plainly. “She was a little tipsy,” Amanda Slaten interjected. “She asked me if I had school the next day. When I told her I did, she said, ‘No you don’t, it’s MLK Day. Let’s go to lunch.’” If you know Alexander, you know this is about par for the course. A civil litigation attorney who specializes in estate planning for LGBT individuals, she is warm, matter-of-fact and will kill you with her dry sense of humor. Eight years in, Slaten, a student at Le Cordon Bleu who works in chef-prepared foods at Central Market, still laughs at all her partner’s jokes. She was having so much fun on that dance floor all those years ago that she didn’t realize she was being asked out. It wasn’t until about midway through dinner (lunch plans fell through) at On the Border that her feelings suddenly clicked. “It’s always been apparent how different we are,” Slaten said, “but we spent four hours on the phone the next night, a ridiculous amount of time for someone not in high school.” Although Alexander had to shoo off some other suitors, she said of her relationship with Slaten, “It’s always been easy, even though we don’t work on paper. And now I’m knocked up with your baby!”
Alexander’s need to always have a plan and her love of a good party can clash with Slaten’s more quiet and spontaneous nature, but they’ve never had trouble compromising. “I love her loyalty, her kindness, her generosity,” Slaten said. “I love how smart she is. I don’t ever doubt us. I know how much she loves me and that she’ll always be there for me, will always take care of me,” Alexander added. They agree that communication and compromise make them a success.
The two are proud to say they’ve never broken up, which can be a rarity in the community, especially in Lubbock, where they spent much of their relationship while Alexander was in law school before moving back to Austin, where her family is from. Perhaps it’s because Alexander refuses to get into a fight, and Slaten refuses to be the ass who picks a fight with the one who hates to argue. Or maybe it’s because they have rituals like Saturday morning breakfast out at favorite haunts like The Omlettry. Or maybe it’s because Slaten doesn’t make Alexander come with her grocery shopping because she knows Alexander hates it. Or perhaps it’s the combination of all the quirky things that two people can share. At any rate, these two are going to be a blast for the child they are bringing into the world.
Their family planning didn’t go as planned. After trying unsuccessfully to get pregnant with a known donor, they went the anonymous route. Slaten was the one who had dreams of being pregnant. When they discovered her body wouldn’t be able to take it, Alexander stepped up. Now, instead of having beers at happy hour, they unwind by reading day-by-day pregnancy books. Alexander may just get her dream of wearing a couple’s Halloween costume when the baby comes along. “I’ve been lobbying for bacon and eggs for four years!” she said. “Maybe the baby could be those little silver dollar pancakes,” Slaten offered, starting to cave on this point. “Or a little pat of butter!” Alexander said. The goofiness and joy they share is clearly going to envelop their little one. Their baby will be a part of a family defined by its unconditional love, its belief that family can be chosen just as much as born into, and she/he will be lucky to have a rich set of both.